The World's Meanest Parents

It is official - I am the World's Meanest Mom!  And Mr. P is the World's Meanest Dad!

As you might recall, in a previous post, I had written about the fact that I have been particularly cranky lately.  My crankiness is due a little bit to the drudgery of daily life, a lot to do with the terrible weather the lovely New England "Spring" brings us, but mostly because my Dear Cherubs have been monstrously horrible.

Over the last few months, they have screamed, sworn, threatened and even have actually resorted to physical violence with each other.  Not only have they been terrible to each other, but they have all of a sudden developed a sense of privilege conveniently smack dab in the middle of the largest recession Mr. P and I have ever been faced with in our household.  Just as Mr. P is telling me to "Tighten up the belt strap", the "I wants, I needs, Go gets" have reached an all time high. 

I think that Dear Cherubs truly believe that whatever the request, Mr. P and I should grant it immediately, without hesitation and ask, "Would you care for anything else, my dears?"  They have also apparently developed the opinion that although Mom and Dad MUST grant every wish, they, on the other hand, have no obligation to do anything requested of them and that is only if the knowledge of our existence is even deemed fit.  

So you see why I am cranky.  Have Mr. P and I been so lackadaisical as to have created these monsters?  I would hope not.  We were going along just fine and all of a sudden, as if by sheer magic, their personalities have been replaced with these frightening alter egos.  Some of our friends, when queried about this horrible change, chalk it up to the "Teenage Years" . . . Dear God, Littlest Cherub is only 12 - if this is the "Teenage Years", I need to start looking into Boarding Schools NOW!

So I have grown crankier and crankier . . . and finally, the other day I told Mr. P that this must end . . . NOW.  So down we sat, and at first stared blankly at each other, both at a loss of how to fix this mess.  

Then, after a while, Mr. P says, "I got it, we take away their lives."

"We CAN NOT kill our children . . . it's illegal if we get caught." (JOKE!  I didn't really say that)

I actually replied, "Take away their lives?  Huh?"

"Yup, every pleasure they have, we start with one week and extend it if we have to.  Teach them that they get nothing if they give nothing."

So that very day, we drew up the "new" rules.  That evening at dinner, we read and reread them with Dear Cherubs.  We asked if they had any questions, we asked if they understood these rules 100%, we asked if they realized that there was NO room for negotiation . . . 

After many tears, a lot of yelling, and about a gazillion "That's not fairs", they said yes, they understood them, no, they had no questions and they still thought it was unfair that there was no room for negotiation.  And then we all signed "The Rules".  We told the children that the signatures made "The Rules" a legal binding document and we could use them in family court if we had to.  Yes, I told you we are officially the meanest parents in the world.

So here you have them, "The Rules" - My Dear Cherubs new way of life for at least one week.

For one full week - 7 days - you will come home and do the following:  EVERY DAY

1.  Immediately do homework and have a QUICK snack

2.  SAMANTHA will check on rabbit and replace food, water, litter and clean cage

3.  Clean upstairs bathroom of debris left from your morning showers

4.  Go directly to bedrooms and if they are not picked up, do so immediately

5.  You are allowed to read or stare at the walls, THAT IS ALL

6.  NO DOORS ARE TO BE SHUT - You are not allowed to speak to each other

7.  You are to do all things requested by mom or dad immediately, without complaint

IF THERE IS ANY ARGUING OR NEGOTIATING, YOUR PUNISHMENT WILL BE EXTENDED

You are NOT to speak to each other for ANY reason for the entire week unless told to do so.

If you do, your punishment will be extended.

There will be NONE of the following:

TV - this includes EVERY TV in the house

Cell Phones

Computer or Telephone use

Ipods, Playstations, Wii, Nintendos, or any other electronic devices - You may READ

JP - loss of ALL Air Soft Guns and ammunition

You will not be allowed to spend time with friends or make any plans.  

You will only do the things mom and dad say you may do with us.

You will NOT request items back, argue, whine, complain, cry negotiate or make ANY comments regarding your punishment.  You will behave in a kind, considerate way and will not make faces, noises or comments under your breath.  IF YOU DO ANY OF THESE THINGS - YOUR PUNISHMENT WILL BE EXTENDED

When the full duration of this punishment is done, you will be on PROBATION for an indefinite timeframe.

Be VERY aware that these rules may come back into effect at any moment and for any extended length of time.  

So, as I said before - I am officially the Meanest Mom in the world and Mr. P is the meanest Dad in the world.  I have so many mixed thoughts about this punishment, but I am agreeing to do it with Mr. P in the hopes to get my Dear Cherubs back and be rid of these alter egos.  So, I truly want to know.  How truly terrible are we?  Tell me what you think.  

By the way - We are now on Day 4 of "The Rules" and I do hate to admit it, but the silence and stillness every afternoon has been a wonderful thing.