Reminders All Around Me

I had my annual physical yesterday.  And it made me laugh.  I love my doctor.  She is always very thorough, doesn't rush me and is (or at least pretends to be) as interested in my emotional and financial states as well as my physical.  It is also great because it is like one-stop shopping.  I can get my physical, pap and most everything else all done within the hour under one roof.  No multiple stops, doctors or appointments.  But that is not what made me laugh.

You see, the irony occurred to me as I lie on the table, clad in a beautiful and truly fashionable paper gown.  The doctor had gone over the usual stuff.  Weight, height, breathing, blood pressure, questions about my emotional state.  She was in the process of that ever dignified procedure of the pap smear and was babbling on about her cold hands when she said, "You know, you are going to be 40 this year."  Like I actually was NOT aware of this fact. 

"Um, yeah."  

"Well, I'm going to give you a script for a mammogram."

"OK"

"And I want blood work done - you can do that today, right here, after you get dressed." (Again, the joy of one-stop shopping)

"Mmm-Hmmm"

"And you should really start seeing a dermatologist regularly.  Oh, and I'm giving you a script for an epipen - you have some food allergies and you know, just to be safe."

"Ok" was my response, but I was really thinking, "What?  An epipen?  I've had allergies since I was a Sophomore in college and you never found the need to prescribe me an epipen before!"  But I didn't. 

And with that, she screwed my DNA infested Q-tip into the little canister to go to the lab, said "You can get dressed at your leisure," and shut the door behind her.  This is when I laughed.

You see, I realized that after spending most of my free time searching out the anti-aging creams, the fashionable clothes, shoes and accessories that will make me feel young and thin, the makeup that will cover age spots, under-eye circles, crow's feet, laugh lines, discoloration, and all but my nostrils so I can breathe - Putting it all together just so - And then finally stepping back, taking a look and feeling youthful and fresh and glowing - there is always the reminder.  The reminder that I am aging.  

This is what my doctor's appointment did for me.  Instead of the quick exam, the "Everything looks great, I'll see you next year," I got the litany of all the appointments, referrals, tests and prescriptions that are usually reserved for the aged in our society.   And it hit me.  One more reminder in my world full of reminders that I am getting old.  

Well, maybe not old, but older.  Old enough to jump up to the next box on the age bracket line when filling out forms.  Old enough that I haven't been carded to buy liquor in about 10 years.  Old enough that young women and men at CVS, the grocery store, pumping gas, etc . . . call me "Ma'am.  And the worst of all, old enough that when I am walking through the mall or down the street with my 22 year old, blond, blue-eyed niece and men and boys alike stare, I know that it is definitely not me they are looking at.  These are just a few of the reminders in my everyday life that aging happens.  And it made me laugh.  Just realizing all this.  I laughed.  

So, I tell  you now, that I have decided to embrace my age.  I will still buy the fashionable clothes and accessories that catch my eye.  And I will still search for the perfect creams and makeup.  But I will no longer do it with the expectation of turning back the clock or the despair that comes with realizing that my new $150.00 "Miracle Cream" is really no miracle at all.  I will do it so I feel good about me and how I look at 40.  I will do it to accentuate my age and not hide it.  And I will laugh while I do all this, because if you ask me . . . I look pretty darn good for 40!